Thursday, March 31, 2011

Thoughts from Week 10

I have some new meds. The symptoms don't include constipation, but they do include drowsiness and trouble breathing. I haven't tried them yet because I don't want to take them at work and fall asleep or take them when Jonathan isn't here just in case. So.. yea.
Had a big bout of morning sickness today. Jonathan was there to witness it for the first time (I usually tell him it's okay that he is away since I just want to get it over with. Today I wasn't able to verbalize it in time). He stayed, rubbed my back, and I think he was shocked at how quickly I transitioned from miserable and incapacitated to energized and ready to go to work. Once it's out, I usually feel 100 times better. It's the days that I'm not able to "get sick" easily that are the most difficult.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Where to Birth?

A friend recommended a documentary to me called Pregnant in America. I'm only 5 minutes into it and I can already clearly read the agenda of the director.

Hospitals are evil and work like a fast food restaurant.
Home births are for mothers who love their babies.
Drugs are bad and doctors are worse.

Really?! Sorry, I don't buy it. Their public opinion footage was filmed in Venice Beach and Times Square. How is that representative of public opinion?

I plan to have an epidural and see the doctor as often as necessary. I know giving birth is tough, but Jesus Christ went through worse on the cross for my sins. I can handle it through His strength and through the wisdom He's given doctors and pharmacists.

Monday, March 28, 2011

10 weeks

Double digits baby! woo hoo!

I'm feeling sicker more often than I'm feeling better. I can rely on throwing up each morning and am sometimes throwing up in the afternoon, too. Today is the first time I threw up phlegm-less food. Go me?  At least I'll finally be losing some weight! 

Baby is forming appendages that look more like appendages and less like fins. Baby is now an inch and a half - a 50% increase!! woo hoo! Grow baby grow!

Friday, March 25, 2011

Grilled Cheese Sandwich

I told Jonathan about my day and he said that I should write the following story in my blog. I laughed and said okay. (this post does have cursing because I did curse. I'm not condoning cursing, but sometimes the words exit my mouth).

These past two days I've been too sick to go into work. Yesterday was the worst- I could only work a half day from home and layed out on the couch from nausea and lightheadedness. There wasn't much I could eat and even less I wanted to eat. After seeing a commercial on TV for cheese, I realized "I want a grilled cheese sandwich!"

I bounded as quickly as I was able into the kitchen, got a slice of  bread, a slice of cheese, and butter to make a half grilled cheese creation. I warmed the stove, buttered the bread, and listened to it sizzle. Wendy Williams was on TV and she is my absolute favorite talk show host. I sat down to watch her for a few minutes, got up, flipped the sandwich, and walked out again. At the next commercial, I walked back in to flip and saw a charred black half to my once beautiful melty masterpeice.

I started crying saying, "Dammit dammit dammit!" (much like Janet's anguish for her older sister Marcia) as I scraped it off the pan and onto a dirty cookie sheet so it could cool before I threw it away. Tears rolling down my face, I went through the motions again by getting out another slice of bread, a slice of cheese, and butter to make another half grilled cheese masterpeice. I stayed in the kitchen this time, twiddling my thumbs for what seemed forever until it was perfectly cooked. As I took a bite of the freshly made awesomeness, it made me gag.

Dammit dammit dammit.

I poured a small bowl of cheerios and sat down to finish Wendy Williams.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Our Story (in a nutshell)

It's official, this blog is going public :)

For those of you just joining us, I am overjoyed and shocked to announce that Jonathan and I are expecting a baby in October! We went through a long and difficult season of trying and we are thrilled!

I had been keeping this blog chronicling our journey to conception and now to parenthood. I do not censor myself in the blog - it is full of frustration, sarcasm, hope, medical jargon, and personal experiences.

Here is a glimpse into our story:

We decided to start trying around Christmas of 2009. The blog itself started in February of 2010 when we thought we were pregnant - I misread a pregnancy test and started the blog within hours of the good news. A few hours after starting the blog, I re-tested with another brand and it was negative. (I never thought I'd be one of those women who would misread a pregnancy test, but turns out its a lot easier than it seems!)

Our town is a young town with conservative values, which means people get pregnant all the flippin' time. Everytime I logged onto Facebook it seemed that someone else was either announcing they were pregnant or just popped out another kid. I was especially frustrated with those younger than us or who had been married for less time (or not married at all) who were having children before us. I started charting, taking my temperature, and becoming overly aware of my ovulation, but nothing was working. In November and January, we had chemical pregnancies (basically a very early miscarriage.) It was devastating and we were more determined than ever to do whatever it took to conceive. We had testing, samples, fertility doctor visits, and nothing happened.

The devastation and frustration brought us to our knees as we finally surrendered everything to God and let Him control our futures entirely. Then God allowed us to conceive!! Looking back, we wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Every bit of this pregnancy, from the nausea to the weight gain, are things that I am so thankful for and will not take for granted.  

Monday, March 21, 2011

9 Weeks

Button is an inch long!

I am 9 weeks! woo hoo! I weigh the same as my pre-prego self but I am still gaining girth!! Ahh! It's annoying to not be able to fit into anything, so I have to wear a lot of elastic skirts and dresses. I let my co-workers know and Facebook will soon know tonight. Once Facebook knows, eeeeeveryone will know. I'm hesitant because I know that I will be forever associated as a mom and no longer just "Laura". It's another chapter closing and a new one beginning!

First baby photo!

YAY! Healthy heartbeat, all is well according to the ultrasound tech - we are tha-rilled!!

Because I'm only 8 weeks, they had to do a transvaginal ultrasound as opposed to one with the jelly and the magic wand. It still involved a wand, just a different kind. Definitely awkward.
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Saturday, March 19, 2011


No one warned me of the impenetrable symptom known as phlegm.  This pesky (and sticky) annoyance has stuck with me since day one. It's actually the only thing I'm always able to throw up (when I do).  The best (and only) solution I've been able to come up with is to sleep on my side.

Still thankful - I'd much rather throw up phlegm than food!

Monday, March 14, 2011

This Week's Thoughts: Week 8

I'm super bloated today - my stomach is pooched out and fairly firm - I look like I'm in my second trimester. I feel gross and confused - am I 8 weeks along or 12 weeks?
There are now 5 people pregnant in my office, including me. Fortunately we are all in different areas of the office, but 4 of the 5 are due in October!! It's going to be a crazy crazy month.
I threw up this morning! YAY! It made me feel much better.
8 weeks (due date of October 23rd)
pregnancy week by week

13 weeks (due date of September 19th)

I feel like I'm 13 weeks. I just emailed my doctor's office to see if they'll be able to test my blood and see how far along - I'm almost positive the answer is no, that the only way to see is to do an ultrasound, but maybe they'll bump my ultrasound up to the 21st :)

The reason for the wonky due dates is because my last period (in January) was 5 days late and super light - which makes me think it was implantation bleeding and not a full fledged period. This means if my last real period was in December, I could pop in September instead of October! It also means this is the last week of my first trimester - weird.
Tomorrow is our first doctor's appointment! We will have a financial meeting, medical history consultation, and the first ultrasound. We'll have a better idea of how far along the baby is and also if they are healthy or not.

We have not announced to the world (aka Facebook) about our baby yet - we wanted to have some kind of assurance from the doctor first. I feel pregnant, I am nauseas which usually means its healthy, but there is always a voice in my mind that says that I'm not going to be a mother. It's not saying I won't be a good mother, it says I won't be one at all. I guess I became so used to the idea of being infertile that I haven't come to grips that I'm having my own child. Tomorrow will hopefully change all of that!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

8 weeks

Button is moving up in the berry world and is now the size of a raspberry!

8 Weeks Pregnant
8 Weeks Pregnant

Pre baby weight - 162
Week 5 - 163
Week 6 - 161
Week 7 - 162
Week 8 - 162

This week was just as nauseating as last week! I haven't been able to throw up but I did dry heave a bit. If I were a barfer, I think I would be feeling better more often. Lately the only foods I can rely on are cold cereal and toast. 

The website says, 
"While your raspberry-sized babe isn't exactly causing you to show yet, chances are your clothes are feeling a little tight around the tummy and you might need a bigger bra. You may also be feeling perpetually queasy. But take heart — your baby feels just fine even while you're hugging the bowl with morning sickness. Try to eat often, but only a little at a time. That should also help your body battle another stubborn woe coming your way soon:pregnancy heartburn. Most likely, you'll find relief as you move into your second trimester, but for now, try to focus on the positive: Morning sickness is usually a sign that your pregnancy is going well. "

Also, I'm going to get some fruit soon. I've been seriously depleted in my fruits and veggies - that needs to change:
"Stronger colors spell better nutrition.  But more often than not, it's what's inside that counts.  So while a cantaloupe pales in comparison with a red apple on the outside, the inside tells a different story; the deeply hued flesh of the melon way outscores the white apple in vitamin and mineral content. Select your produce, then, by the color of its “inner” rainbow when shopping and you'll find nutrients worth their weight in gold."

Saturday, March 12, 2011

This Week's Thoughts: Week 7

Dry heaving is illogical. If there's nothing there, why would my body want to engage my stomach and throat in the purging of air and stomach acid? Very illogical.

Feeling worse, the anti-nausea medicine is making me nauseas.
I would much rather throw up and feel better than feel nauseas alllllll day.

Friday, March 11, 2011


I'm getting used to feeling awful. I'm functional enough for work but not functional enough to be standing/walking around for long periods of time. I stepped off of this week's music team rotation until I can get this kid under control. (Who would have thought I'd have compliance issues so early!) The sicker I feel, the more I think I'm further than 7 weeks. I won't have a sonogram until March 29th, which is 18 days away!! AHH! At that point they'll be able to measure the baby and tell us how far along we are. On a positive note, I had a grilled cheese and hot dog yesterday for lunch - and I finished both! Today I had a hamburger and a hotdog - AND I finished both! I'm on a roll (budum ching.. get it? yea its a bad joke. I blame the baby.)

Jon's been driving me to work everyday since we work on the same campus, just different sides of it. It's so nice to not drive but it's not fun to have him drive me home when I feel bad - it disrupts his day. I feel okay when I drive, but I've been a semi-space cadet lately and I don't want to risk driving when I'm not fully alert.

Last night Jon and I had a fun iChat with Brad and Courtney. They are expecting their first baby about two months before us and we were showing each other the loot we were accumulating. We traded baby book photos, they showed us their 3-D sonogram photos, I showed them my ukulele, they showed us their dogs, we showed them our cat, and we gave each other house tours. I love technology!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Food : Part 2

Nothing nothing nothing tastes good.

We had dinner last night at Friday's with close friends. I felt like I could eat a burger so I ordered one, along with spinach artichoke dip. The guy brought out both together instead of bringing the dip out as an appetizer.. whaaa?... so I start trying to eat my burger and I get two bites in before I have to push it away. The dip comes and I start eating that slowly and I don't get too far. I had a cucumber or two off of someone's salad and just called it quits. It's so frustrating to feel hunger then feel a huge stop sign hit your face.

I'm tired of ginger ale, I'm so tired of crackers, I can't eat pizza or pasta. Just typing about food makes me feel awful... honestly the only thing I can reliably eat is Oat Nut toast with extra butter.

I'm going to get my Rx this afternoon. Ondansetron, I hope you can be my hero. This kid is such a picky eater just like his/her mother!
I took half of a tablet and let it dissolve on my tongue - it tasted really sweet like a strawberry Tums. I fell asleep for a few hours and woke up feeling bloated and hungry, but not queasy! yay!

Sunday, March 6, 2011

7 weeks

Button is officially the size of a blueberry!

I'm glad it's looking more human every week. Button looked really creepy in the baby book my mom got us.

Pre baby weight - 162
Week 5 - 163
Week 6 - 161
Week 7 - 162

This past week was the most nauseating, but who knows what the future holds! I have not felt discouraged through this tummy ickiness- I am way too thankful to not enjoy every moment of this. It's strange to say I'm enjoying feeling queasy, but it's a reminder that I'm pregnant! How is that not awesome!!

The website says this about nausea and vomiting :

Nausea and vomiting: Don’t choose the nursery colors just yet, but studies do show that moms-to-be who are severely nauseated in the first trimester tend to be carrying girls, thanks to the interplay of hormones produced by you and the female fetus. But regardless of your baby’s gender and how sick you feel, you’ll still want to keep some food down. Stick to foods that appeal to you, even if you’re only eating fruit salads for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. (Your baby’s nutritional needs are tiny at this point, so no worries.)

On a "I love my husband" note, Jonathan said the baby probably put in a work order for extra milk so they would have a good supply. haha

Saturday, March 5, 2011

This Week's Thoughts: Week 6

Sorry Charlie, I'm not winning like you are.  I'm a blob on the couch again  :(
I've never felt this woozy and weak this often. I am in a constant state of "uggh" and "bleeeh". Gingerale and rice cakes aren't cutting it anymore - I just want to take a magic pill that will knock me out until the second trimester. I'm trying to be thankful through this nausea and remember that its a blessing to be pregnant. It's hard when I want to run to the john and relieve my ickiness.. is that how you spell ickiness? Is it ickyness? Ugh.
Water, soy crisps, carrots, and applesauce. guh.
My office, built in the belly of an old cell phone factory, is poorly insulated from sound. They are currently hammering in a metal stairway above my ceiling with very thin tiles to separate me from the pounding.
Zolfran to the rescue!! Called the doctor's office and they put in a Rx to Target. I'll hopefully be nausea free soon.
Came home craving Pad Thai, I made corn and ate grapes instead.

I was greeted by a package from my mom! She bought me two books which I will blog about tomorrow.  My dad got me a stunning pearl necklace in a pretty pink box from The Philippines - it is so beautiful!! I can't wait to wear it. He also got me a beautiful handkerchief as well.

Just barfed. It's the first barf of the pregnancy. Yay?

I took a 5 hour nap after work and woke up to eat dinner. I think the biggest loss are the frozen thin mints. And now they're gone. All gone.

Since it happened at 12:30 a.m., is it morning sickness or very late night sickness?


Staying home from work today. Bleeeeeh. 

Friday, March 4, 2011

Working Out: Part 1

I'm going to attempt to work out today for the first time since finding out I am pregnant. It's been over 3 weeks since I last worked out..  I'm just going to get on the treadmill and walk for 45 minutes or so and see how it goes. I'm not feeling super up to working out, but I know I should. I ate a lot more today than I did yesterday. I actually ate a full lunch! AND it was free Fry-day at Chick-Fil-A, so I had a grilled chicken sandwich, waffle fries, and more waffle fries. I almost finished my sandwich and I ate almost all of my fries. LET'S DO THIS!

By the way, this is in no way an artist rendering of myself, but I really liked her hair so I decided to post it. :)

My workout didn't suck but it didn't feel great. I power walked on an incline for 1.74 miles. It was a nice workout to ease myself back into the routine of having a routine. We got a pizza on the way home so that didn't help the calories I just burned.
Had a date night with a fellow prego :) We had fun drinking non caffeinated beverages while laughing through a Baby Book at Barnes and Noble. There are some really stupid names out there. If I name my child something wretched, please please please let me know.